BETWEEN THE LINES: They are now all gone
My mother-in-law Kay Ellis died April 16. My wife and I now are orphans, as both sets of parents are deceased. The people who did the most to shape our lives by teaching us the values we live by are forever gone.
The entire process began 13 years ago with my father’s death at age 82. Next was my father-in-law, Pat Ellis, who died in 2003. My mother followed in 2009 at age 86.
Pat Ellis and Art Laughlin loved their respective families. They both believed their duty was to provide for their families, and not rely on the federal government to perform that task.
They accomplished this by working hard their entire lives. Neither ever was unemployed. They never drew unemployment benefits. I cannot recall my dad ever staying home from work, which means he was either never sick or went to work when he was ill.
From our fathers we learned to put in a good day’s work, even if the pay was not adequate. Neither ever complained, they just diligently went about doing what was necessary to provide for the families they cherished.
Gina and I did not make a conscious decision to follow in our fathers’ footsteps; we just assumed that was the way life was supposed to be. It is not rhetoric people follow, but actions. If children observe their parents staying home and living off government-entitlement programs, the odds are they will follow in their footsteps.
After all, why work if a decent income is provided by Uncle Sam?
Kay Ellis and Frenchie Laughlin were stay-at-home mothers who focused on matters at the house. They paid close attention to their children’s progress in school, and held high expectations of them. When their children were sick, they provided comfort and assurance that everything was going to be fine. They kept their homes clean and took pride in preparing meals from scratch.
Gina and I never were concerned about our parents divorcing. In fact, the word was not in our vocabulary, neither was the term child abuse. Life was routine because that is the way God intended it to be. It was when society chose to remove God from the public square that America changed. The greatest tragedy in our country is not the national debt, but the demise of the American family.
My wife and I have attempted to teach our children the valuable lessons our parents taught us. It was a challenging endeavor to raise children in a world hell-bent on minimizing parental influence and focusing instead on a child’s self-esteem. To the extent we succeeded is a tribute to our parents.
I have spent the past three decades of my life marveling at the love and loyalty Kay’s children have shown their mother. They were devoted to her until the very end. What greater tribute can a parent have than the love and admiration of their children? One’s net worth and other accolades received pale in comparison.
Our parents have left us, but the memories and lessons they have given us will serve us well until our time comes.
Laughlin is a Christian Libertarian. He is an economist, teacher, father, husband and most recently a grandfather. He has written a weekly column for The Tribune for 12 years. He and his wife Gina reside in Meadowlakes. To contact him, e-mail ablaughlin@nctv.com. He is an independent columnist, not a staff member, and his views do not necessarily reflect those of The Tribune or its parent company.